04.12.20 | 1028 am

i'm out of practice


i forgot this place even existed. both this physical, diaryland space and this angsty, emotional space.

but then a series of events led me to intensely relive portions of my life from ages 16 to 20. long, long forgotten feelings reignited as if doused with gasoline before the spark. i feel like the victim of romantic arson. i wasn't looking for this. i'm twenty years older and far, far less boy crazy. but then like a drone strike, from clear blue skies come pretty words and 'remember whens' and revelations of unspoken teenaged crushes, which absolutely crushed me.

so i wrote a haiku about it:

this is gonna hurt
when reality creeps in
maybe it's worth it?

forgive me, i'm out of practice.